HIS PRESENCE IS ENOUGH

“One thing have I desired of the Lord,

And that will I seek after;

That I may dwell in the house of the Lord

All the days of my life,

To gaze upon the beauty of the Lord

And to inquire in His temple.”

Psalm 27:4

The world is inundated with voices speaking.  The competition to get into the mix is fierce.  Tongues stumble over one another trying to get into the game.  It is overwhelming to the mind and soul to even hear them much less listen and reflect on what is being said.

In the flood of human words God’s words get buried and indistinguishable.   That is the point I must stop and withdraw from the arena.  In the Quiet His words rise in my spirit and I can hear and digest them in my mind, heart, and soul.

I spent many years finding my voice, believing I had something to offer to the conversation many were having about the church, religion, and things of theological worth.  I studied and trained to be able to compete with the other voices, but never found a place at the “adult table”.  I tried not to feel bad about my lack of “the right stuff” but I did, on some level, wondering why.

I remember a lesson I had learned in my younger years when I was encouraged by a teacher to be a professional golfer.  “You could be another Patty Berg” he used to tell me.  I loved sports and played many because I enjoyed the games.  But I found when I was working to make it a profession I wasn’t enjoying it.  I was worried about my performance and stressed about the competition.  As Ben and Jerry say, “If it isn’t fun why do it?”  I stopped working on a lucrative career and just went back to playing the game.

I love spending time in the mornings just simply being in God’s Presence, having coffee, communion and conversation with Him then and throughout the day.  I delighted in the insights He shared with me and discovering answers to the questions I asked.  When I tried to “Professionalize” that, it changed my inner feeling of joy and began to feel like a job.  Seeing my old friend Brian last week reinforced that difference in my mind. 

I seek God’s Presence for the deep joy of it, not to get something out of it.  I found myself missing that joy and wanting it back.  I don’t want to be another voice in the sea of voices.  I want to be His kid and enjoy His Presence and delight in our communion and conversation.  I am not aiming at being a ‘professor of faith’ but being a knowledgeable and faithful prayer, an invisible under girder of others and this world.  I want to be like Anna and Simeon who saw Jesus as an infant and knew who He was because they were silently and secretly waiting for Him, as they spent their time in the temple, in God’s House, in His Presence.