I Don't Know How But I Do Know Who

Matthew 11: 28-30

Mark 4: 26-28

I find this world exhausting.  I find the negative energy exhausting.  The anger, holding on to grudges when things don’t go my way, unforgiveness of wrongs done to me, holding on so tightly to what I perceive as my rights;  it all just exhausts me physically, mentally, and spiritually. 

These past few years have been restorative for me.  I have been able to resolve things that I could and have learned to let go of the others.  I have come to the conclusion that forgiveness is freeing and repentance is restorative.  The conditions of this country, this world, continually show me that I am right in my thinking and beliefs.  The consequences of the denial of God’s Way for His creation have been played out right in front of us.  I believe an acceptance of God’s Way for His creation is the only satisfactory and sustainable solution.  I know that by the ultimate Truth revealed in Jesus and in the Bible.  I know that by personal experience.

God created human beings for a wholesome Way and a particular path; it is the life and teachings of Jesus Christ that speaks to and provides for that Way to be lived by me.  There is no other Way, Truth, or Life.  When I receive, believe, and commit myself to that Way, I will do well and the snares of Satan will have no hold on me. (Genesis4)

Holding on to wrongs done to me is like running poison through my veins.  It makes me judgmental, mean, angry, and vengeful.  I harm myself as much as whatever was done to me.  I had the opportunity over the past few years to revisit people and situations that did harm in some way to me that I have been holding onto for many years.  I was able to bring resolution and restoration to most of them.  The ones I was unable to revisit I simply needed to forgive.

Some of this work was conscious; some was hidden deep within that I wasn’t even aware of.  But at some point in time I felt a lightness and a freedom in my sol that just manifested itself one day.  I knew something had changed deep in my inner self that was now coming out in my thoughts and feelings.  I felt a joy and a peace that passes all understanding and I knew I was  different as I sat there enveloped in joy, peace, and awe.

What I find true now is that I don’t want to be judgmental, mean, angry, or unloving even when in my mind I can justify being all those things.  It isn’t worth it anymore to be “right” in my mind but hardened in my heart.  I don’t know how this, what I would call a major miracle came about, but I do know Who accomplished it.  I am eternally grateful.  I know now that I want to be yoked together with Jesus forever.